As far as I'm concerned, there were none. All of the "you'll love being pregnant" and "it's the best time in a women life"--all bull. Don't get me wrong, the end result, 17 years later, is a beautiful young woman that I am very proud to call my daughter and friend. I did not love being pregnant nor was it the best time of my life.
I had been on the pill for over ten years so when I went off, I would not let my husband touch me for a month, I wanted nothing left in my system. Let's just leave it that he took a lot of cold showers that month. There was also a deadline, there was no way I was going to be pregnant over the summer months. With a smirk on his face, his said "No problem, you want a baby, done deal. You'll be pregnant in a week or less". This was in July, I got pregnant in November which meant I would be pregnant through the summer. So much for "No problem" and "Done deal".
My body must have changed the moment the baby was conceived. I spent the next six weeks thinking I had the flu bug. After a visit to the doctor's, I discovered my "flu bug" had arms and legs. The next three months I ate nothing but watermelon hard candy and saltines. I am convinced that the term "morning sickness" first came out of a man's mouth, because no woman would ever call it that. The only time I wasn't sick was in the morning! When I asked my doctor if it would ever end and when I would start enjoying my pregnancy, he said, "Morning sickness only lasts through the first trimester. You'll start enjoying it then". How naive I was.
Because of family history, I have always had, not high blood pressure but borderline to high. My pressure began to drop like cement shoes on an unfortunate informant. I was sure that I would be dead before the baby was born. I was no longer sick everyday but with my pressure dropping, I would become lightheaded and have to fight the urge to faint. During this time the baby felt the need to let it's presence known. Bet you're thinking, butterflies and gentle little kicks...dead wrong. My bladder was used as a punching bag during the day and a pillow to be fluffed at night. Needless to say, to this day, I can still pee on demand. Something one might not be proud of, but a talent nonetheless.
It was also during my second trimester that the doctor thought that the baby may have Downs Syndrome. It's head was measuring to large compared to the femur. I spent hours, well maybe not hours, trying to convince this educated man that I was the abnormal one in the family. I have long legs, no one else does. I have long "pickpocket" fingers, no one else does. If I didn't look like my Dad, I'd be hunting down the Fuller Brush man now. So, after all the testing, amniocentesis, the weekend of contractions, and eating like food would become scarce any minute, I find out the baby is normal. No kidding. The "I told you so" was spoken aloud.
Medical science is wonderful. The amniocentesis was able to tell us if we would have a boy or girl. My husband and I had decided that we would wait until the little bundle of joy to arrive. However, my, who I thought was a traditionalist, mother was with me. She wanted to know the sex and started after the doctor. Those of you that knew my mother can picture this, right? What can I say, I caved. I knew a half a dozen women in the waiting room and the thought of my mom running after the doctor was more than I could handle. So I was having a healthy baby girl. Who had a crazed woman as a Grandmother. Again, I asked my doctor when I would enjoy my pregnancy. "This is just a little bump in the road. You'll be enjoying it soon". I was so naive.
It wasn't long after that when the doctor wanted to know how I gained eight pounds in two weeks (eating was the answer) and was told my blood pressure was so high that I was out of work on maternity leave on stroke precautions. My house has never been cleaner than those first three days on leave. I would love to know how you can rest, on your left side mind you, from two o'clock until four when the only time he makes his appointments for me was between two o'clock and four. I was in his office at least three times a week and sometimes up to four times a day having stress tests done. By that time, he had me in the hospital to have the non stress tests done. I had learned how to cheat (she wasn't a very active baby)...elevated heart rate, baby is moving, hit the button and make doctor happy. Works like a charm.
Right about now, it's June, due on August 8th. I ask the doctor one last time, "When am I going to start enjoying this pregnancy"? He answers in a quiet, sad voice, "When the baby is born".
And that my friends is a story for another time.
I had been on the pill for over ten years so when I went off, I would not let my husband touch me for a month, I wanted nothing left in my system. Let's just leave it that he took a lot of cold showers that month. There was also a deadline, there was no way I was going to be pregnant over the summer months. With a smirk on his face, his said "No problem, you want a baby, done deal. You'll be pregnant in a week or less". This was in July, I got pregnant in November which meant I would be pregnant through the summer. So much for "No problem" and "Done deal".
My body must have changed the moment the baby was conceived. I spent the next six weeks thinking I had the flu bug. After a visit to the doctor's, I discovered my "flu bug" had arms and legs. The next three months I ate nothing but watermelon hard candy and saltines. I am convinced that the term "morning sickness" first came out of a man's mouth, because no woman would ever call it that. The only time I wasn't sick was in the morning! When I asked my doctor if it would ever end and when I would start enjoying my pregnancy, he said, "Morning sickness only lasts through the first trimester. You'll start enjoying it then". How naive I was.
Because of family history, I have always had, not high blood pressure but borderline to high. My pressure began to drop like cement shoes on an unfortunate informant. I was sure that I would be dead before the baby was born. I was no longer sick everyday but with my pressure dropping, I would become lightheaded and have to fight the urge to faint. During this time the baby felt the need to let it's presence known. Bet you're thinking, butterflies and gentle little kicks...dead wrong. My bladder was used as a punching bag during the day and a pillow to be fluffed at night. Needless to say, to this day, I can still pee on demand. Something one might not be proud of, but a talent nonetheless.
It was also during my second trimester that the doctor thought that the baby may have Downs Syndrome. It's head was measuring to large compared to the femur. I spent hours, well maybe not hours, trying to convince this educated man that I was the abnormal one in the family. I have long legs, no one else does. I have long "pickpocket" fingers, no one else does. If I didn't look like my Dad, I'd be hunting down the Fuller Brush man now. So, after all the testing, amniocentesis, the weekend of contractions, and eating like food would become scarce any minute, I find out the baby is normal. No kidding. The "I told you so" was spoken aloud.
Medical science is wonderful. The amniocentesis was able to tell us if we would have a boy or girl. My husband and I had decided that we would wait until the little bundle of joy to arrive. However, my, who I thought was a traditionalist, mother was with me. She wanted to know the sex and started after the doctor. Those of you that knew my mother can picture this, right? What can I say, I caved. I knew a half a dozen women in the waiting room and the thought of my mom running after the doctor was more than I could handle. So I was having a healthy baby girl. Who had a crazed woman as a Grandmother. Again, I asked my doctor when I would enjoy my pregnancy. "This is just a little bump in the road. You'll be enjoying it soon". I was so naive.
It wasn't long after that when the doctor wanted to know how I gained eight pounds in two weeks (eating was the answer) and was told my blood pressure was so high that I was out of work on maternity leave on stroke precautions. My house has never been cleaner than those first three days on leave. I would love to know how you can rest, on your left side mind you, from two o'clock until four when the only time he makes his appointments for me was between two o'clock and four. I was in his office at least three times a week and sometimes up to four times a day having stress tests done. By that time, he had me in the hospital to have the non stress tests done. I had learned how to cheat (she wasn't a very active baby)...elevated heart rate, baby is moving, hit the button and make doctor happy. Works like a charm.
Right about now, it's June, due on August 8th. I ask the doctor one last time, "When am I going to start enjoying this pregnancy"? He answers in a quiet, sad voice, "When the baby is born".
And that my friends is a story for another time.
2 comments:
End on a smile, brilliant work Lynda.
I want more.
Write...
so not loving being called IT i am not a stephen king character!! but i like it anyway =]
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